Muốn phát triển bản thân, hãy hiểu rõ động lực hành động của mình và bắt đầu từ những thứ cơ bản nhất với lòng kiên định không bao giờ đổi thay.
Có lẽ bạn chẳng còn lạ trước những câu nói đại loại như: “Lúc này là lúc nào rồi mà cậu còn đọc đống tiểu thuyết vô vị đó nữa!”, “Đã đến lúc bạn thôi học theo những cuốn sách phát triển bản thân sáo rỗng”… Mỗi khi nghe được những câu nói có nội dung tương tự, tất cả những gì tôi có thể nghĩ tới là sự kiêu ngạo.
Ý của những người đó thực sự là gì khi nói mình không cần học hỏi nữa? Ý họ là họ quá tốt, quá xuất chúng để tiếp thu những kiến thức mà những người xung quanh đang chia sẻ. Nói như vậy khác gì tự vênh mặt dạy đời rằng: “Tôi giỏi rồi, tôi không cần quan tâm đến thứ đó”. Và đó chính xác là kiểu người tôi sẽ không bao giờ kết giao.
Trào lưu và giá trị cốt lõi
Tôi từng làm việc tại một phòng gym khi còn là sinh viên. Trong thời gian đó, tôi nhận ra rằng thế giới chia làm hai loại người khi đi tập gym. Một loại vô cùng dễ gặp: những người đăng ký đi tập để bắt kịp trào lưu làm đẹp mới nhất.
Luôn có những người chạy theo trào lưu đơn giản chỉ vì nó “hot”. Những người như vậy tới đăng ký thẻ tập, tập chăm chỉ được vài buổi rồi không bao giờ thấy xuất hiện lại tại phòng gym nữa.
Nhưng cũng có những người quan tâm hơn đến giá trị cốt lõi một hành vi mang lại. Họ không để ý tới xu hướng mà cả xã hội đang theo đuổi. Thay vào đó, họ được truyền cảm hứng từ giá trị mà bản thân hướng tới – đó có thể là bất kỳ thứ gì tương tự như việc giảm cân, rèn luyện sức khỏe…
Những người như vậy quan tâm tới thành quả. Họ luôn tự hỏi rằng: “Các chiến lược có hiệu quả hoạt động như thế nào? Điều gì tạo nên giá trị cốt lõi của hành động này?”.
Tất nhiên, nhóm người này là thiểu số. Nhưng những người tập trung vào giá trị cốt lõi luôn là những người bám trụ tới phút cuối. Thành thực mà nói, làm việc tại phòng gym cũng là câu chuyện của tôi 10 năm trước rồi. Thế nhưng, giờ đây, khi đi tập, đôi khi tôi vẫn vô tình lướt qua vài gương mặt thân quen đã từng gặp ở nơi tôi từng làm.
Kể cả bậc thầy thiền định vẫn ngồi thiền mỗi ngày
Điều tôi muốn nói ở đây là khi bạn quyết định theo đuổi một con đường, một hành vi nào đó, nó sẽ trở thành lối sống của bạn. Và những người cho rằng mình đã học “xong” một thứ gì đó, ngay từ đầu đã không theo đuổi nó với sự đam mê thích đáng.
Họ chỉ bắt theo một trào lưu nào đó. Điều tương tự cũng xảy ra với việc phát triển bản thân. Vì thế, lần sau nếu đọc được bất kỳ bài viết nào nói rằng bạn nên bỏ đọc sách và sống thực tế hơn, hãy lờ nó đi.
Nếu bạn chưa thực sự hài lòng với một thứ gì đó, hãy lặp đi lặp lại việc đó ở cấp độ cơ bản nhất.
Tôi vừa đọc xong cuốn sách “Mindfulness in Plain English” (Tạm dịch: Tĩnh tâm theo đúng nghĩa) của Bhante Gunaratana, một thầy tu theo đạo Phật. Một điều thú vị tôi học được từ cuốn sách này là ngay cả những bậc thầy về thiền định vẫn ngồi thiền hàng ngày. Họ tập luyện như những người mới bắt đầu. Và họ chưa bao giờ ngừng học thiền định.
Sao con người ta cứ cố từ bỏ một thứ gì đó đã trở thành lối sống? Vì sao những người đó lại bỏ tập gym? Vì sao họ từ bỏ những cuốn sách phát triển kỹ năng dễ dàng đến vậy? Tất cả chỉ vì một chút thiếu kiên nhẫn. Câu nói của Gunaratana khiến tôi thực sự tâm đắc:
“Kiên nhẫn là chìa khóa. Hãy kiên nhẫn. Nếu bạn không học được gì từ việc ngồi thiền, ít nhất bạn sẽ rèn luyện được lòng kiên nhẫn. Kiên nhẫn là điều kiện cần cho bất cứ sự thay đổi đáng kể nào trong cuộc đời”.
Tự hỏi bản thân rằng bạn đang cố làm mới mình vì lý do gì. Nếu bạn có “những lý do to hơn mục đích” như cố gắng gây ấn tượng với ai đó, hay trở nên giàu có, bạn sẽ sớm bỏ cuộc nếu việc bạn làm không ngay lập tức mang lại kết quả.
Khi bạn có suy nghĩ rằng lúc nào mình cũng là người mới, sẽ không có chỗ cho sự kiêu ngạo để bạn phát ngôn rằng “Tôi không cần làm việc này nữa”. Bạn sẽ không bao giờ nghĩ mình là kẻ biết tuốt mỗi khi đọc xong một quyển sách.
Nếu bạn có động lực bên trong, lòng kiên nhẫn của bạn sẽ tự động xuất hiện. Khi bạn không còn hành động vì tác động của các yếu tố bên ngoài, bạn sẽ có được ý chí, tư duy của những vận động viên bắt đầu ở vạch xuất phát. Và đó chính là chìa khóa đảm bảo thành công lâu dài.
Không ngừng lặp lại những gì là giá trị cốt lõi
Mỗi hành động đều có giá trị cốt lõi của nó. Từ việc thiền định tới tập luyện, ăn kiêng rồi tới các triết lý, không hành động nào tồn tại mà không có nội hàm. Tập trung và không ngừng lặp lại các giá trị cốt lõi đó, đừng quên đi cái căn bản. Điều này sẽ giúp bạn khiêm tốn và trở thành con người tốt hơn.
Vận động viên bóng rổ xuất sắc nhất hành tinh tập ném tự do không dưới một nghìn lần. Kobe Bryant nổi tiếng với câu chuyện thực hiện 100.000 lượt bắn trong suốt kỳ nghỉ của mình. Tim Duncan, một huyền thoại bóng rổ khác, thậm chí còn được mệnh danh “Quý ngài căn bản” bởi sự nghiệp của ông được xây dựng trên lối chơi cơ bản nhất. Có người xem đó là an toàn, là nhàm chán. Nhưng với tôi, đó là sự hiệu quả. Bạn thấy đấy, không ai trong số họ quên đi sự căn bản.
Vậy nên, bạn sẽ chẳng bao giờ “học xong” các những điều cơ bản. Học hỏi là một quá trình chỉ kết thúc khi cuộc đời bạn chấm dứt. Vì thế, đừng bao giờ ngừng học hỏi trong cuộc sống này!
*Theo Dariusforoux – một doanh nhân, blogger, podcaster và tác giả của cuốn sách nổi tiếng “Massive Life Success”, đồng thời anh cũng là nhà sáng lập ra hệ thống Procrastinate Zero nhằm giúp mọi người hiện thực hóa được mục tiêu của mình.
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After I originally left a comment I seem to have clicked on the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now whenever a comment is added I receive 4 emails with the exact same comment. Is there a way you can remove me from that service? Thanks a lot.